What it's like to be me, after a nightmare January

So it is safe to say i have had a nightmare January, my mum had a hip operation so has been on crutches for the last month, this i could handle.

Then my Dad had a heart attack, luckily a mild one which was caught fairly early just a week after my mum came out of hospital. So hear i am thrown into taking on all the responsibilitys of looking after my mum, worrying about my dad and checking my dads house everyday to make sure the cat and parrot are ok, constant chores around the house and driving which in principle is fine and a non mental health sufferer may look at this and think "So what?" but these chores involve the following kind of rituals otherwise something awful will happen.

Putting the washing on the line will mean having to put the clothes on the line in the "correct" order, this may fluctuate with me putting one item on the line, then my OCD changing its mind so i have to switch it with another item.

Changing my bed sheets, simple enough? not when you have to decide what order you feel you have to put the bed sheets on first, when your OCD is constantly changing what order

Every movement i make between chores involves constant, touching of my bed, door, wall if it did not feel right when i moved passed it and repeating of my steps if they did not feel right either.

All this non stop all day apart from the brief moments i get when i can sit down and relax, along with that the usual worrying about my Dad anyway and how he would get on with his operation, but why did this heart attack happen? Was it because of such and such ritual i could not do that day few months ago, or that ritual that did not feel quite right that time but i ignored it anyway. So now of course i am constantly watching all my rituals to make sure they feel right, this is the true story of what its like for many OCD sufferers day in and day out.