My Winter struggles

So its that time of year, pretty much where my OCD, Depression, Anxiety all take a tumble together i would say 60% of that is due to my SAD so i got my UVA Light out again this week, but of course my OCD has dived in controlling when i can or can't use it otherwise something really bad will happen sooooo kind of awkward.

But for me my struggles go slightly beyond the SAD, for me this time of year is very good at highlighting what i do not have due to the many social occasions which crop up.

Halloween? feels like everyone but you is out having fun, dressing up going to partys etc.

Christmas? feels like everyone is out partying with friends, spending it with a boyfriend or girlfriend etc apart from you

New Years? feels like everyone is out partying apart from you, it is all very good at highlighting what you feel you don't have

Now of course really i am not the only one, i know that but when you physically feel alone you really do feel like the only one and increased OCD and Depression is great at convincing you of that aswell.

All this gives my OCD great head space, i am foot tapping and repeating my footsteps so much i am moving my feet more than Michael Flatley *is that how you say it?* my friend joking that a lightbulb in his house keeps blowing due to paranormal activity has sent my superstitious OCD into a massive tail spin.

I try to find more things i do to enjoy to help me relax but my OCD powerful than ever convinces me most the time NO or bad things WILL happen to you.

So yes it is a massive struggle but i try to realise i been here before and got through it so i can again and thats what all us mental health sufferers need to remember.